CONFESSION: Today I went the entire day with a chocolate stain on my shirt and I didn't know it. People must have been thinking when they saw me "Look at this grown man with chocolate on his shirt. He looks ridiculous. THERE'S NO WAY I'M TAKING THIS GUY SERIOUSLY."
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"Not only is pizza attractive and charming, he also has a huge penis." - Awkward Smile
CONFESSION: when I was a little kid, I would do horrible things to ants. I would stomp on them, flood their nests, and fry them with a magnifying glass. I think most kids did stuff like that, but I would very vividly imagine my antics being reported that night on the ant news. I pictured ant families gathered around, watching ant TV, hearing about a horrible flood, or how the sun suddenly intensified and fried dozens of ants, or how a giant just came in and started stomping on ants.
I would imagine the president of the ants giving a speech urging the ants to not despair in these dark times.
NO DAMN WAY, me too. I would pour water on top of ant hills, and I pictured like an ant general shouting orders at everybody, and there'd be some ant in a power station going "WE JUST LOST ALL POWER AT ENTRACE 5! THEY'RE DOOMED!" It was like an action movie!